View Full Version : quotable quotes
Rob D
Aug 21, 2006, 01:32 PM
music, film, life, whatever. if you've heard it and liked it, throw it in here.
Bullox
Aug 21, 2006, 01:33 PM
see my sig.
Bullox
Aug 21, 2006, 01:34 PM
do tigers sleep in lilly patches?
do rhinos run from thunder?
StinkyPinky
Aug 21, 2006, 01:35 PM
I never let anyone rent space in my brain.
DMB.TheGurl
Aug 21, 2006, 01:36 PM
No one is to be called an enemy, all are your benefactors, and no one does you harm. You have no enemy except yourselves.
St. Francis of Assisi
Adam
Aug 21, 2006, 04:33 PM
"my arm smells like lemons and masturbation" - mr. ryan hudak
StinkyPinky
Oct 27, 2006, 06:10 PM
You had me at 'Hello'.
:lol
firedwarftj
Oct 27, 2006, 06:11 PM
"We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!"
I couldnt resist ...
OlivePoet
Oct 28, 2006, 12:57 PM
"my arm smells like lemons and masturbation" - mr. ryan hudak
:lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao
dmbinchicago
Oct 29, 2006, 10:42 PM
"The greatest weakness of most humans is their hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they are still alive." - O.A. Battista
davehead34
Oct 30, 2006, 08:45 AM
This whole passage is so money...
Trent: You know what you are? You're like a big bear with claws and with fangs...
Sue: ...big fucking teeth, man.
Trent: Yeah... big fuckin' teeth on ya'. And she's just like this little bunny, who's just kinda cowering in the corner.
Sue: Shivering.
Trent: Yeah, man just kinda... you know, you got these claws and you're staring at these claws and your thinking to yourself, and with these claws you're thinking, "How am I supposed to kill this bunny, how am I supposed to
kill this bunny?"
Sue: And you're poking at it, you're poking at it...
Trent: Yeah, you're not hurting it. You're just kinda gently batting the bunny around, you know what I mean? And the bunny's scared Mike, the bunny's scared of you, shivering.
Sue: And you got these fucking claws and these fangs...
Trent: And you got these fucking claws and these fangs, man! And you're looking at your claws and you're looking at your fangs. And you're thinking to yourself, you don't know what to do, man. "I don't know how to kill the bunny." With *this* you don't know how to kill the bunny, do you know what I mean?
Sue: You're like a big bear, man.
Mike: So you're not just like fucking with me?
Trent: No I'm not fucking with you.
Sue: Honestly, man.
PedroPSK
Oct 30, 2006, 02:23 PM
“Not from me….you get no immunity from me you piece of shit!
Every criminal I have put in prison, every cop that owes me a favor, every creep and scumbag that walks the street for a living will know the name of Verbal Kint.
Now you talk to me or that precious immunity they seem so fit to grant you, won’t be worth the paper the contract put out on your life is printed on.”
Dave Kujan – The Usual Suspects
melissann
Oct 30, 2006, 02:58 PM
“Not from me….you get no immunity from me you piece of shit!
Every criminal I have put in prison, every cop that owes me a favor, every creep and scumbag that walks the street for a living will know the name of Verbal Kint.
Now you talk to me or that precious immunity they seem so fit to grant you, won’t be worth the paper the contract put out on your life is printed on.”
Dave Kujan – The Usual Suspects
one of the BEST movies. EVER.
THE Chad
Oct 30, 2006, 03:10 PM
oh, nothing, it's just that you don't seem like the type of person who knows when to back off from something. It's not always a BAD thing, but yeah, like I said, good thing I know you else you would still be breathing out of a hose. - Katie Brady
melissann
Oct 30, 2006, 03:12 PM
oh, nothing, it's just that you don't seem like the type of person who knows when to back off from something. It's not always a BAD thing, but yeah, like I said, good thing I know you else you would still be breathing out of a hose. - Katie Brady
:lmao
Katie Brady
Oct 30, 2006, 03:13 PM
oh snap.
Brian Lisk
Oct 30, 2006, 03:28 PM
This whole passage is so money...YES!!! (See my user title under my username!!)
Anyway... This is my favorite quote of all time:
"Once in a while you get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right" - Robert Hunter (Grateful Dead lyricist from the song "Scarlet Begonias).
davehead34
Oct 30, 2006, 03:48 PM
YES!!! (See my user title under my username!!)
Anyway... This is my favorite quote of all time:
"Once in a while you get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right" - Robert Hunter (Grateful Dead lyricist from the song "Scarlet Begonias).
:thumbsup :thumbsup I thought your user title (or whatever the hell it's called :lol) was from Swingers! :lol That movie is so on point! And that GD quote is also a great one. I love the Dead!
THE Chad
Oct 30, 2006, 03:52 PM
oh snap.
Katie, should I not have done that? :shrug
Katie Brady
Oct 30, 2006, 04:19 PM
Katie, should I not have done that? :shrug
no, its fine. Its more of an:
OHHHHH SNAAAAAAAP!:lmao
rather than "chad, you loser, what the hell!"
it's all good.
THE Chad
Oct 30, 2006, 04:22 PM
no, its fine. Its more of an:
OHHHHH SNAAAAAAAP!:lmao
rather than "chad, you loser, what the hell!"
it's all good.
I thought it was funny as hell and needed to be in the quotable quotes!
:p
StinkyPinky
Oct 30, 2006, 04:54 PM
'Lock it Up!' :lol :lol
Koreelove
Oct 30, 2006, 04:55 PM
'Lock it Up!' :lol :lol
:lmao :lmao :lmao
firedwarftj
Oct 30, 2006, 04:58 PM
'Lock it Up!' :lol :lol
:lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao
dmbinchicago
Oct 30, 2006, 08:30 PM
"People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come, Ray. People will most definitely come." James Earl Jones as Terrence Mann, Field of Dreams
firedwarftj
Oct 30, 2006, 08:34 PM
"What happens on the mile stays on the mile. Always has." - Paul Edgecomb, The Green Mile
firedwarftj
Oct 30, 2006, 09:43 PM
"I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round
I really love to watch them roll
No longer riding on the merry-go-round
I just had to let it go"
davehead34
Oct 31, 2006, 08:30 AM
We can't stop here - this is bat country.
-Fear & Loathing in the Greatest City in the Goddamn World
PedroPSK
Oct 31, 2006, 10:42 AM
“My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.” – Gladiator
the best part about it is you can see Cesar shit his pants as Maximus takes his helmet off and says this to him. plain as day. drops a load right there in front of everyone.
StinkyPinky
Oct 31, 2006, 10:43 AM
“My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.” – Gladiator
the best part about it is you can see Cesar shit his pants as Maximus takes his helmet off and says this to him. plain as day. drops a load right there in front of everyone.
I LOVE that movie...........GREAT choice!
ryangibson
Oct 31, 2006, 11:58 AM
It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day that you realise how often they burst into flames.
-- Harry Hill
keels
Oct 31, 2006, 12:05 PM
"Work like you don't need money,
Love like you've never been hurt,
And dance like no one's watching."
dmbinchicago
Oct 31, 2006, 07:34 PM
"Fredo, you're nothing to me now. You're not a brother, not a friend. I don't want to know you or what you do." - Al Pacino as Michael Corleone, The Godfather
Bartender
Nov 1, 2006, 01:27 PM
It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day that you realise how often they burst into flames.
-- Harry Hill
That is some funny shit right there....
dmbinchicago
Dec 10, 2006, 01:10 AM
"Honesty is the best poetry" - Gregory Alan Elliott
athousandyears
Dec 10, 2006, 01:19 AM
“My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.” – Gladiator
the best part about it is you can see Cesar shit his pants as Maximus takes his helmet off and says this to him. plain as day. drops a load right there in front of everyone.
One of my favorite quotes from Gladiator. I love that movie.
Siserilla
Dec 15, 2006, 10:28 PM
I just found a notebook of quotes I made when I was 16 and I found some good ones I thought I'd share:
"Some people aren't meant to fit into your life no matter how much you want them too."
"Sure I could just walk away from you, say goodbye, and never look back, but you don't turn your eyes from the sun just because you can't hold it in your hand."
"A friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself."
God I sound depressed.
dmbinchicago
Dec 16, 2006, 03:01 AM
One of my favorite quotes from Gladiator. I love that movie.
Strength... and honor.
"Scotch... and soda" - Tony Soprano
dmbinchicago
Dec 28, 2006, 12:41 PM
You know when you go to the fridge for some chocolate... and you get there, and all you find is some jellies or something. And you eat the jellies... but what you really wanted was chocolate. Then your roommate gets home, and he's like "hey, where's my jelly?". And you're like, "well where's my fuckin' chocolate?" Anyway, this song isn't really about chocolate.
-Damien Rice (paraphrased) before playing Volcano, 12.19.06-
SeanTrantham
Dec 28, 2006, 02:00 PM
"To honor...to getting on her, statying on her, and if you can't cum in her, cum honor"
Me
boarder
Dec 28, 2006, 02:06 PM
do tigers sleep in lilly patches?
do rhinos run from thunder?
:boarder
Always recognize your fate
Always just a moment late.
ryangibson
Jan 15, 2007, 11:51 AM
I saw on HBO, they were advertising this boxing match. They said "it's a fight to the finish." That's a good place to end. - Mitch Hedberg
ryangibson
Jan 15, 2007, 12:06 PM
I bought myself a parrot; the parrot talked, but it did not say "I'm hungry", so it died. - Mitch Hedberg
dmbinchicago
Jan 15, 2007, 05:46 PM
More from my Word Doc that I have built over the years...
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves. -Carl Jung
Two kinds of people fail: Those who listen to nobody; and those who listen to everybody. -Daniel Bershere
Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. -Plato
Love people and use things. Never love things or use people. -Unknown
PedroPSK
Jan 29, 2007, 11:10 AM
Fenster: “I had a guy's fingers in my asshole tonight.”
Hockney: “Is it Friday already?”
“Who's Keyser Soze?”
“One cannot be betrayed if one has no people”
“The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.”
“Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.”
“…just like that…he’s gone!”
– The Usual Suspects
:sadie
dmbinchicago
Jan 29, 2007, 11:56 AM
"Is it better to be feared, or loved?"
"It's nice to be both, but it's very difficult. But, if I had to choose, I would rather be feared. Fear lasts longer than love."
- A Bronx Tale
steffie224
Jan 29, 2007, 01:11 PM
“Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.”
– The Usual Suspects
:sadie
holy crap! I say that like ALL THE TIME. Doesn't he also say "I'm not affraid of the devil, but I am affraid of Kaiser Soze"? :dunno Maybe that's something we just made up way back in the day.
I actually convinced a friend to name their cat Kaiser Soze one time. It was so awesome callinig that little bugger.
anyways- Here's another awesome one from Usual Suspects:
Cop: Number 1, step forward.
Hockney: Hand me the keys, you fucking cocksucker.
Cop: Number 2, step forward.
McManus: Give me the fucking keys, you fucking cocksucking motherfucker, aaarrrghh.
Cop: Knock it off. Get back. Number 3, step forward.
Fenster: [laughing] Hand me the keys, you cocksucker.
Cop: In English, please?
Fenster: Excuse me?
Cop: In English.
Fenster: Hand me the fucking keys, you cocksucker, what the fuck?
steffie224
Jan 29, 2007, 01:12 PM
:lol
I still laugh at that.
PedroPSK
Jan 29, 2007, 01:52 PM
:lol
I still laugh at that.
LOL me too! I love that scene also!
FWIW - that came up this morning b/c I was listening to that movie at work this morning. :)
StinkyPinky
Jan 29, 2007, 01:59 PM
"Is it better to be feared, or loved?"
"It's nice to be both, but it's very difficult. But, if I had to choose, I would rather be feared. Fear lasts longer than love."
- A Bronx Tale
" I can't dew Cawfee Cake! "
dmbinchicago
Jan 29, 2007, 02:02 PM
" I can't dew Cawfee Cake! "
"ut a screen in front of your face, while I throw shit at it!"
And because you made me watch Godfather this weekend...
"She threw it all away just to make me look ridiculous. And a man in my position cannot afford to be made to look ridiculous!"
steffie224
Jan 30, 2007, 12:40 AM
:lol
I still laugh at that.
:lol
still laughing
melissann
Jan 30, 2007, 06:47 AM
:lol
still laughing
it cracks me up everytime. :lol
dmbinchicago
Jan 31, 2007, 08:23 PM
"That's what you're worried about? Mickey Mantle? Mickey Mantle makes $200,000 a year, what does your father make? See if your father can't pay the rent, go ask Mickey Mantle. See what he tells you. Mickey Mantle don't care about you, so why should you care about him? Nobody cares."
-A Bronx Tale, again
PedroPSK
Feb 1, 2007, 09:09 AM
“So I was sitting in my cubical toady and I realized, ever since I started working…umm…every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me…that’s on the worst day of my life.”
“You see the thing is Bob, it’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that I just don’t care”
– Office Space
steffie224
Feb 1, 2007, 11:08 AM
"What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?"
- bumper sticker
SpoonSister
Feb 1, 2007, 11:12 AM
“So I was sitting in my cubical toady and I realized, ever since I started working…umm…every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me…that’s on the worst day of my life.”
“You see the thing is Bob, it’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that I just don’t care”
– Office Space
:lmao
:thumbsup This is one of my favorite office quotes ever in life!
THE Chad
Feb 1, 2007, 11:43 AM
Clarice (Jody Foster): If you didn't kill him, then who did, sir?
Lecter (Anthony Hopkins): Who can say? Best thing for him, really. His therapy was going nowhere.
~ "Silence of the Lambs"
THE Chad
Feb 1, 2007, 02:47 PM
ok...I'm about to make back-to-back posts but this is from one of my top 5 fav movies of all time. It's from Clerks.
Dante Hicks: I'm stuck in this pit, working for less than slave wages, working on my day off, the steel shutters are closed, I deal with every backward-assed fuck on the planet, I smell like shoe polish, my ex-girlfriend is catatonic after fucking a dead guy, and my present girlfriend has sucked thirty-six dicks.
Randal Graves: Thirty-seven.
Bullox
Feb 1, 2007, 03:31 PM
i once had an infestation of koala bears.
it was the cutest infestation ever.
Bullox
Feb 1, 2007, 03:33 PM
it had salt in it. big grains of salt...
Bullox
Feb 1, 2007, 03:34 PM
obviously you're not a golfer.
SpoonSister
Feb 1, 2007, 03:37 PM
"I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it."
~Jack Handey
dmbinchicago
Feb 23, 2007, 03:35 PM
Inspired by all the Godfather talk today...
"It makes no difference to me how a man makes his living, understand. But your business is... a little dangerous"
"You can have my answer now, if you like. My offer is this: nothing. Not even the fee for the gaming license, which I would appreciate if you would put up personally."
"Senator, this man does not understand English. He came here of his own free will to supoprt his brother in his time of trouble"
sunshower
Feb 27, 2007, 08:11 AM
"When they discover the center of the universe a lot of people will be very disappointed to discover it's not them."
- Unknown
"I forget about you long enough to forget why I need to."
- Matt Nathanson
"I can believe anything, provided that it is quite incredible."
- Oscar Wilde
"Time will come that all that we love we will eventually lose, and all that we hate we will eventually face".
- F. Sionil Jose The Mass
"You know you are in love when you see the world in her eyes and her eyes everywhere in the world."
- David Levesque
JenLuvsDMB
Feb 27, 2007, 08:45 AM
"Whores don't take days off."
~ Dad
dmbinchicago
Feb 27, 2007, 08:53 AM
Saw this on someone's computer at work yesterday. It was very timely.
"Champagne for my real friends; real pain for my sham friends"
Welcome to my signature, Sir Francis Bacon.
JenLuvsDMB
Feb 27, 2007, 09:00 AM
Saw this on someone's computer at work yesterday. It was very timely.
"Champagne for my real friends; real pain for my sham friends"
Welcome to my signature, Sir Francis Bacon.
:lol :lol
I love it!
sunshower
Feb 27, 2007, 08:53 PM
Scene: Ray LaMontagne show one evening in Chicago. A stolen backstage pass and determination. During our chat, he said the following:
"Never wish to be in somebody else's shoes. You just never know where your own will take you."
- Ray LaMontagne
Rob D
Oct 14, 2008, 05:00 PM
...
DMBTattoo
Oct 14, 2008, 05:21 PM
"But I dont wanna be a pirate"
mxpxillini35
Oct 14, 2008, 11:35 PM
Every man dies...but not every man really lives...
-Braveheart
DMBTattoo
Oct 15, 2008, 12:12 AM
everytime i see this thread title i want to say:
Potent Potables
(name where its from)
Rob D
Oct 15, 2008, 08:38 AM
everytime i see this thread title i want to say:
Potent Potables
(name where its from)
c'mon.
we would of accepted bow wow or ruff.
ahhh, rough. just the way your mother likes it, trebek!
McGinnisM
Oct 15, 2008, 08:43 AM
The following quote took place at the Rothbury music festival, summer 2008.
Me: (talking to my wife) let's just go back to the tent, I don't want to wait in this long ass line for you to get a massage.
Sara: (to me) Shut the F**k up, you just bought $245 worth of posters.
She got her massage, end story.
DMBTattoo
Oct 15, 2008, 09:07 AM
c'mon.
we would of accepted bow wow or ruff.
ahhh, rough. just the way your mother likes it, trebek!
:)
Lets see your answer:
Buck...oh that must be your wager, lets see what you put down..
Futter
Buck Futter...I am speechlesss
mxpxillini35
Oct 15, 2008, 10:59 AM
everytime i see this thread title i want to say:
Potent Potables
(name where its from)
Old school SNL!
The Rapists for a hundred alex...
That's therapists mr. connery
mxpxillini35
Oct 15, 2008, 11:00 AM
You'll rue the day you crossed me Trebek!
ryangibson
Oct 15, 2008, 01:55 PM
everytime i see this thread title i want to say:
Potent Potables
(name where its from)
First thing I thought about too.
DMBTattoo
Oct 16, 2008, 01:10 AM
You'll rue the day you crossed me Trebek!
thats a nice suit you are wearing, where did you get it?
(some store name i forgot)
I have one question though, do they make them for men?
Rob D
Oct 20, 2008, 04:02 PM
Sean Connery: I've got to ask you about the Penis Mightier.
Alex Trebek: What? No. No, no, that is The Pen is Mightier.
Sean Connery: Gussy it up however you want, Trebek. What matters is does it work? Will it really mighty my penis man?
Alex Trebek: It's not a product Mr. Connery.
Sean Connery: Because I've ordered devices like that before, wasted a pretty penny, I don't mind telling you. And if The Penis Mightier works, I'll order a dozen.
Alex Trebek: It's not a Penis Mightier, Mr. Connery. There's no such thing!
Nicholas Cage: Wait, wait, wait.. are you selling Penis Mightiers?
Alex Trebek: No! No, I'm not.
Sean Connery: Well, you're sitting on a gold mine, Trebek!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Alex Trebek: Mr. Connery, go ahead.
Sean Connery: The day is mine! I'll take Famous Titties for 400.
Alex Trebek: Titles, Famous Titles.
Sean Connery: Damn!
Alex Trebek: And the answer is: This movie title is taken from the name of the book "Gone With The Wind." Mr. Sean Connery.
Sean Connery: Dolly Parton!
Alex Trebek: Titles, Mr. Connery. Not titties.
Sean Connery: Not a fan of the ladies, are you Trebek?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sean Connery: It looks like this is my lucky day! I'll take "The Rapists" for $200.
Alex Trebek: That's "Therapists." That's "Therapists," not "The Rapists." Let's skip "Therapists" and try "Household Objects", for $400. And the answer is, "You usually drink water out of one of these." [Sean Connery buzzes in] Sean Connery.
Sean Connery: A leather glove!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sean Connery: Now listen to me! You back off, Trebek! You wouldn't have known that if you didn't have that card in front of you! This guy reads from a card!
Rob D
Oct 20, 2008, 04:02 PM
Alex Trebek: And welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. Because of what just happened before during the commercial, I'd like to apologize to all blind people and children. That said, let's take a look at the scores. Robin Williams has set a Jeopardy record by buzzing in 2,000 times and never answering a question.
Robin Williams: Yes, Thank you, yes, Jeopardy, yes. [ Walks over to Trebek ] I heal you, my boy you are healed. We have found Tom Selic's mustache, yes. It's time to go over here and look at the scoreboard. What do we have here, oh Vana White. Can we turn the letters? She's making a vowel movement. Yes. Oh, hi, I'm Robert Downy Jr. Robert Downy Jr. wants a recount, yes, and here's a kid at home going [ whining ]
Alex Trebek: Thank you, thank you. Moving on. Catherine Zeta Jones has no score at all because she's mostly been talking about her recent marriage.
Catherine Zeta-Jones: Alex, I'd like to say hello to my new baby and wonderful husband. Michael, darling, if you're watching, the diapers in the bedroom closet and the baby's diapers are under the sink. I love you darling.
Alex Trebek: That's beautiful. And finally, Sean Connery's also here let's move on to Double Jeopardy where the categories -
Sean Connery: Not so fast Trebek.
Alex Trebek: I really thought that was going to work.
Sean Connery: Well, you were wrong, you mountebank. I pose a conundrum to ya, I riddle if you will
Alex Trebek: I don't want to hear it.
Sean Connery: What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck and I can't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore. [ Laughs ]
Alex Trebek: Wonderful. Let's take a look at the categories. They are: Potent Potables, Point to your own head, Letters or Numbers, Will this hurt if you put it in your mouth, An album cover, Make any noise, and finally, Famous Muppet Frogs. I should add that the answer to every question in that category is Kermit.
Robin Williams: Thank you, yes, Kermit. Yes it's like Kermit and John Wayne goin, "It's not easy being green, pilgrim." It's like Schwarzenegger,"Ya, I'm Kermit the frog, ya that's me, Schwarzenegger Kermit."
Sean Connery: Boy, you might be legally retarded.
Alex Trebek: He has a point. All right, Catherine Zeta Jones we'll start with you.
Catherine Zeta-Jones: I'll take Giraffes for a billion.
Alex Trebek: Let's just go with Letters or Numbers for 200. And the answer is "five." Is five a letter or a number? The number five, is it a number? [ ring ] Mr. Williams.
Robin Williams: Oh, it's a beautiful thing yes, right now there's a guy at home goin [ motions a remote control w/ his hand ] what the hell's goin on there, why don't you change -
Alex Trebek: Thank you. Thank you. [ ring ] Mr. Williams, you already rang in. Robin Williams: Yes, it's a beautiful thing, though. Monica Lewinsky's at home goin' [ screams ]
Alex Trebek: Thank you, thank you, anyone else. [ ring ] Mr. Williams, I hate you.
Robin Williams: But I love you! It's like Jesse Helms and Michael Jackson going, "Yo quiero Taco Bell!"
Alex Trebek: You are a very sick man. Anyone besides Mr. Williams? [ beep ] Five is of course, a number. Catherine Zeta Jones, sadly, it's still your board.
Catherine Zeta-Jones: I'll take TV shows that did stories about my wedding for 300.
Alex Trebek: For the last time, that is not a category. Sean Connery, why don't you pick?
Sean Connery: Well, the game is afoot. I'll take anal bum cover for 7,000.
Alex Trebek: That's An album cover, not anal bum cover.
Sean Connery: I can read, Trebek. That says Anal bum cover. I've spent five years of my life trying to invent an anal bum cover, failing to do so is my greatest regret.
Alex Trebek: You have lead a horrifying life. The category is An album cover and the answer is: The Beatles White album is this color. [ ring ] Catherine Zeta Jones.
Catherine Zeta-Jones: Who are the Beatles?
Alex Trebek: I'm sorry, that's wrong.
Catherine Zeta-Jones: No, I'm asking you, who are the Beatles, I've never heard of them. [ ring ]
Robin Williams: Oh, the Beatles, oh yes, what if they were the Volkswagon Beatles? Then they'd be in the back going, "I wanna hold your farfigneugent"
Alex Trebek: For the love of God, shut your mouth. I'll tell you what, let's just go to final Jeopardy. And the category is, you know what? You guys just decide. You each ask your own question and answer it. There's no way you can get this wrong, because you're asking the question. Ask yourself anything at all and then answer it. You'd have to be the dumbest people in the world to mess this up; and now let's see how you managed to mess it up. Robin Williams wrote: Nothing. Because he stuck his pen through his own hand.
Robin Williams: Yes, you know what it's like, suddenly it's like a Shakespearean actor who's gay going, "Tell us for york I" [ Trebek grabs pen and sticks it deeper into Williams' hand ]
Alex Trebek: Don't ever come here again. Catherine Zeta Jones, asked herself this question: What sound does a doggy make? Fine. And you answered: [ Blank ] You didn't know the answer? You couldn't answer your own question?
Catherine Zeta-Jones: It was hard.
Alex Trebek: Unbelievable. And finally, Sean Connery asked himself: [ Show half a picture of a horse having sex w/ Trebek ] Ok, I, I think I know where this is going. Let me just see here, [ Looks over podium ] Yeah, yeah, that's a horse having sex with me. Ok. That's beautiful.
Sean Connery: Come on, you pansy, let the people see my work.
Alex Trebek: No, we're not going to do that. Ok, I quit, again. Good night.
DMBTattoo
Oct 20, 2008, 04:07 PM
HAHAHHA
I love celebrity jeopardy.
DMBTattoo
Oct 20, 2008, 04:07 PM
wait..how did you get a marker in here, we frisk you on the way in!??
DMBTattoo
Oct 20, 2008, 04:24 PM
for my 1000th post:
"a lil' while ago, we used to come down and uh, in our red van and play here all the time you know...aw, it was good, a couple holes in the wall, they werent as big as this, but you know big holes are fun and so are small holes..."
-Dave Matthews, VaTech, 9/6/07
clwatt3
Nov 13, 2009, 02:42 PM
"I would love to do a movie naked; it would be beautiful. No one dares make that kind of film today. They did it in the 1930s in an arty way, so why not now?"
Megan Fox
jiatlas
Nov 13, 2009, 02:50 PM
3272
VA Legend
Nov 13, 2009, 02:50 PM
I like this thread.
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." - Gandhi
I like to apply this to the legalization fight. We're almost there!
deludo
Nov 13, 2009, 03:44 PM
great thread...
"the only thing you regret in life are the risks you dont take"
jiatlas
Nov 13, 2009, 03:47 PM
great thread...
"the only thing you regret in life are the risks you dont take"
damn straight!
Mave Datthews!
Nov 13, 2009, 04:58 PM
3272
:lmao
"A man will always sacrifice sleep for sex."
- Jerry Seinfeld
ThePrestige
Nov 13, 2009, 05:06 PM
"I would love to do a movie naked; it would be beautiful. No one dares make that kind of film today. They did it in the 1930s in an arty way, so why not now?"
Megan Fox
Soild bump, :thumbsup
deludo
Nov 16, 2009, 08:06 PM
"living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see"
mxpxillini35
Nov 16, 2009, 10:04 PM
-What's the piano for? Who in the band plays piano?
-I don't know. Maybe Butch is coming back tonight.
SPAC 09 - N2
McGinnisM
Nov 16, 2009, 10:21 PM
for my 1000th post:
"a lil' while ago, we used to come down and uh, in our red van and play here all the time you know...aw, it was good, a couple holes in the wall, they werent as big as this, but you know big holes are fun and so are small holes..."
-Dave Matthews, VaTech, 9/6/07
Almost 8000 posts in 13 months....
27Ravens
Apr 20, 2010, 07:19 PM
"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint" ~ Mark Twain
Mave Datthews!
Apr 20, 2010, 11:12 PM
I love Mark Twain. :lol
"When angry, count ten. When very angry, swear."
DMBTattoo
Apr 21, 2010, 01:23 PM
Almost 8000 posts in 13 months....
hahah goodness...and more now...
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